It’s my birthday and I can share one of these cheesy, lesson style blog posts if I want to!!!!!!!!
I reflect on lessons regularly, but I always appreciate the landmark that birthdays provide to really take a serious look at how much you’ve evolved. My 25th year was undoubtedly one of my most impactful years. And it was a massive pivoting chapter for me. I grew exponentially in confidence, inner peace and perspective. Relationships, career goals and creative endeavours crystalized. Mostly, I feel like I just gained a lot of clarity. But I feel this shaping and forming a lot more as I move closer to 30.
For the first time, I was able to authentically write and narrow down 26 lessons. Lessons that I have learnt from wake-up calls, personal development, external reality, people and just a bit more life experience. Nothing about these feel distant but a deep part of my continuous journey. I’m confident in saying that I learnt and applied them all to my own life, especially in year 25. So here it goes….
- Healing starts with you. It’s all internal. You don’t always get closure; you don’t always get apologies. You can’t control what other people do, but you can control how you move forward. Holding on is more dangerous than letting go.
- Always be open to the ‘new’. New people, ideas, places, hobbies etc. There’s magic awaiting for you in the new.
- You can’t fake sincerity.
- Your path is nowhere near identical to another’s. It’s okay if others your age are at a different stage of their lives. It’s their life. This is yours and it’s as beautiful and valuable as anyone else’s.
- A meaningful friendship means never having to question it. Work hard to keep these ones around.
- Your worth is not tied to what you do. It’s tied to how you treat others. It’s tied to being right here, right now. Being present and human.
- Blaming an industry’s competitiveness for not pursuing your passion is an excuse. There is competition everywhere. There are always going to be others who do what you do and do it well. But what do you contribute and how? Persistency. That’s what matters.
- It’s okay to say ‘No’ sometimes. It doesn’t make you a bad person if you don’t have the capacity.
- Receiving love is just as important as giving love. Give yourself permission to receive love without guilt.
- Flossing is EVEN more important than brushing your teeth. Add it to your routine.
- Nobody really knows what they’re doing.
- Learning your love languages will be an instrumental tool for being a better communicator and lover.
- Rejection is a blessing in disguise. Truly, I feel like I’ve learnt this and felt this lesson by my 26th year. It still hurts, but it’s just an opportunity for something that is more meant for you – whether with your dating life or your career.
- I think we have many callings. You are allowed to change what you like. We are fluid; we evolve over time and so does our interests, social groups and skills. Changing career paths is not only expected but completely understandable.
- Playing with style, fashion and make-up should feel like fun, not work or something you have to do. Also, take risks sometimes.
- Using the local language to say “Hello, how are you” partnered with a genuine smile is a universal language of love and respect.
- Having an attitude of gratitude is essential, it’s like oxygen for your soul. Maintain a mindset of abundance, rather than scarcity.
- Don’t decide you don’t like something until you do it or try it.
- Nostalgia shouldn’t be a crux to avoid change. Embrace it.
- Nothing is guaranteed and everything is temporary. You don’t always know if you’ll have time. You don’t always know if you can see that person again. The present moment is all that’s certain. Use it wisely and compassionately.
- Softness is strength. Vulnerability is strength.
- Making your bed really does start your day on the right note. So does a skincare routine.
- First impressions matter and so does your gut intuition. But life does surprise us. And giving people the benefit of the doubt is a good practice. And also just being realistic that you truly don’t always know what somebody is going through. But generally, your gut is 99% right.
- Once you start looking at dating as 50 % work/50% low expectations – you’ll have much better experiences.
- Connect to your body as much as possible – it’s your shelter, your instrument and your engine for living. Move it. Thank it. Appreciate it.
- Taking action on something without being attached to the outcome (like really choosing to not let an outcome dictate your skills, worth, etc). will be one of the most liberating, empowering feelings. Do it more.
BONUS lesson because I’m feeling extra fancy:
Get into the habit of using contractions in your writing again. They are okay to use. Normal in fact. Too many academic papers in university taught me otherwise. But writing “do not” instead of “don’t” outside of school just sounds silly.
Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk!
peace & love,
Lydia
